Forget the Shoulda’s!

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A group of people stand in a circle.

One person holding two tennis balls (or something similar) stands in the center. The center person tosses one of the balls out to a person in the circle and that person tosses the ball to another person in the circle a few positions to their left. That person tosses the ball back to the center person, who then tosses the ball out again to someone just to the left of last player and the whole pattern starts again, moving around the circle in a triangular pattern.

When the confidence of the group grows, the center person tosses one ball to one person in the circle, waits a beat and then tosses the other ball to someone just to the left of the first person. Now the balls move around the circle and back to the center in a series of overlapping triangles.

With one ball...

The main object of the game is to see how many times the group can keep those balls going around before one is dropped.

When the group hits a real ‘groove’ the sound of the balls being caught and tossed in a relaxed but steady rhythm is remarkable.

Inevitably someone drops a ball. Someone isn’t watching, or someone throws to the ‘wrong’ person. Sometimes someone gets hit in the side of the head! This is a much more difficult game than it sounds. Dropping the ball is not the big problem however. The big problem comes next: when someone, in explaining why they just dropped the ball (literally!) they start a sentence something like “I thought that…” or “You were supposed to…” or “You should have…” etc.

That’s when I stop the game and have that wonderful teachable moment.

This game is a great expression of teamwork. First, while there is a leader, once the balls are in the air, the whole thing takes on a life and rhythm of its own. Second, while there are some rules and some general predictability, that’s it. Even when everyone is doing their best, things happen, and balls get dropped. Life happens.

The heart of this teachable moment is this: deal with what is rather than what should be.

As those balls go around the circle, each person has to be aware and focused. The ball is thrown a ‘few’ positions to the left around the circle. Not 2 positions, not 3, a ‘few’. That means you can’t depend on Joe throwing to Sue standing beside you every time just because he did it the last few times. Its not that predictable. And sometimes, especially when there are two balls going around, people make mistakes. Sometimes they throw the ball back to the person in the center right away, rather than to the left. Sometimes the ball goes to the left twice. When those things happen, it is remarkable how often the first thing out of the mouth of the person who dropped the ball (or got hit by it!) says something like “You should have…” or “That was supposed to…”

They have forgotten the main objective. Yes there are rules, but this game is not about the rules. The main objective is to see how many times the group can keep those balls going around the circle. To do that successfully, every team member will do their best to stick to the basic rules, but more importantly, they have to keep the balls going despite errors and lapses.

Sound familiar?

This game does do a wonderful job of making concrete two important team behaviours:

1. Being present and dealing with what is. Any well-run business or project has some form of plan, or at the very least, priorities and objectives. But once you get going all kinds of un-expected events occur, both good and bad. The success of the business depends as much on our ability to deal with what actually happens, as on the quality of the original plan. In fact in my experience, the ability to make quick tactical changes in response to the unexpected is more important than good planning skills.

2. Keeping the focus on the main objective, not on the ‘failures’ of teammates. Everyone makes mistakes, and it is the leader’s job to monitor, coach, correct, etc. When the rest of us get distracted in ‘correcting’ our team-mate’s failures, we risk losing sight of the big picture. Furthermore it introduces blame into the picture. When we blame, not only do we lose sight of the balls that need to be kept in the air, we now have conflict. And unless the leader brings the focus back to the larger objective immediately, we all know where that goes.

By the way, if you are wondering how successful most teams are at this game the first time out, few ever complete even one full circle. Another lesson: great teamwork is harder than it looks. It takes practice.

Want to take the blah-blah-blah out of your next retreat or management seminar? To learn how an improv workshop with me can do that,contact me at clemens@clemensrettich.com. Improv takes great communication and management strategies,and makes them real and unforgettable.

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